Laundry

We finally got a new washing machine. Well, a new to us washing machine. I believe it is actually from the 21st century. Our old one had to be from the 80s, which was fine, until it left us with a tub full of water and clothes to contend with.
Note: If your washer dies with water in it don't just remove the clothes and close the lid and go on your merry way. It will fester and mutate into something that smells like a swamp with raw sewage in it. Trust me.

And, in honor of our new washer Sadie started saying "laundry " repeatedly while dancing around on the clothes pile and transferring the clothes between our two baskets. Well, actually she's saying "lonnie," but seeing as how we don't have anyone named Lonnie living here that I know of I'll chalk it up to the fact that she's 18 months old.

Ahnnies

We had a hobo in our house the other day. Now, before you get too excited it wasn't a Depression-era, rail-riding hobo who called me missus and ma'am and did a few chores for some grub. It was this:

If you're wondering what in the name of God this thing is, so were we. Now I'm not scared of spiders normally, but this was extra creepy and just gave off a vibe of being the kind of spider you don't want to meet in a dark alley. We put it outside and then found out it was a Hobo Spider AKA the "aggressive house spider."
When they do bite the wound can take a month to a couple of years to heal. Yikes. I guess we should have squished it.

Anyway, why am I telling you this?
I am going somewhere with this, you know. So when our exterminator came out for our monthly visit (for our ant problem) I told him about the spider and what looked like the hatching nest of the same spiders out on the deck the day before that I had killed. Yes, a funnel web with a gazillion of these little guys all running around on it. Sadie had pointed it out to me, "Wow! Mama!"

He sprayed for the spiders with a barrier spray. Oh, good. But suddenly the next day we were overrun with ants again. Because that barrier spray formed a barrier, all right, all those spiders outside wouldn't come in but everything that was inside the barrier couldn't leave. So these trapped and hungry ants were coming down the hall, around the corners, into the living room. They were everywhere.
And Sadie loved it! She would point and scream and laugh at these teeny ants.
When we told her they were ants she started calling them "ahnnies" which just killed us. Is that not so cute? And, to boot, I began to picture them like this, which amused me more:

Little Orphan Ahnnies, if you will.
Just wanted to share that.
Oh, and the exterminator came back and the ahnnies are on their way out again.
Sorry, Ahnnies, this ain't Daddy Warbucks' house! You're not gonna like it here! Think of me as Ms. Hannigan. OK, enough Annie references.

It's the Hard-Knock life for you, Ahnnies!

OK, now I'm done.

Oh, and look at this picture:

That's your prize for humoring me.

Riding my Tricycle

A day without rain. We whipped out the bikes and took a ride seeing as how it is going to start raining again tomorrow.
I'm totally starting to get pissed. I shake my fist at the sky, but to no avail. Then I looked at the weather on our home coast, the coast where so many of you lovely readers reside. And I saw it was going to be 100 degrees and humid. And I started to feel better.
I hope you all stay cool!
Here are the long-awaited tricycle pictures.
It's OK, you can laugh. We LOVE our trike so much that we're rubber and you're glue and anything you say bounces off us and sticks to you.

Did you Know...

That you can leave comments on the blog by clicking the comments link at the bottom of each post?
You can even do it every time I post, if you want. I mean, if...if you want to.
I know you 5 people who read it can do that for me. C'mon.
I would love to hear what you have to say. It can get lonely in the blogosphere, you know.

Hello...?
New Post below!

No more classes, no more books, no more teachers' dirty looks!

Will graduated today. They held a graduation for his MFA program, which, being only 12 people, was a small and intimate affair.

They did some readings of their work and then the ceremony began. Sadie decided that it wasn't fair that Dada got to sit up in front of everyone in a special chair so she had to join him.

Notice the piece of melon hanging out of her mouth. She would stick it in there every time everyone clapped so she could clap and yell "YAY!" too.


Here Will is after being handed his diploma. He's thinking, Two years of near-constant work for this?
Here he is putting on a brave (and goofy) grin to mask his disappointment:

You guys know I'm kidding, right?

Here I am with Sadie:

The whole fambly:
And a cute shot of Sadie sitting in a chair. Look at that munchkin! Don't you just want to give her a big old kiss?:

Rain, rain, go away!

It will not stop raining. It just keeps raining. Every morning and afternoon and evening I take a peek at the 10 day forecast. I don't know if I look repeatedly to punish myself or if I'm just enough of an optimist that I think it's going to go from a forecast of 60 degrees and rainy to 80 and sunny.
I am desperate for warmth. Desperate, I say.
Sadie has taken to being obsessed with standing in the window looking out. Hey, it's not like we don't leave the house or anything- sheesh, what do you take me for?
It's that she had a taste of the yard and now she wants more- I don't blame her.

I have a cute video of her standing on the couch singing but at the end she sort of falls. I'm right there and all but I thought if I put it up y'all would realize that I am not above letting my child slip a little in order to get some cute video.
Maybe one day you'll get to see it if you all sign the waiver I am working up for all viewers of my blog. You know, the one where nothing I write here can be held against me by you. It's all perfectly legal...

Anyway, we went out in the yard- rain, be damned! And I took some shots of the garden for you guys. And I can come back in a month and look at these pics and ooh and aah over how great it looks. First, here's a video of what Sadie was doing out there:

Next, one of our raised beds:

A squash blossom! A squash blossom!:
Did you know it has been my dream for years to grow potatoes? No? I thought we were friends. How could you not know that? Potato plant:

Our first tomatoes. Roma. We have 11 tomato plants because I'm hoping to can some. Stay tuned for the "How to Can Tomatoes with a Toddler" post:
The wall of blackberries. These blackberries, I swear they have a personal vendetta against me. If I walk within a foot of them one of their arms (arms?) shoots out and gouges me somewhere. But I'll get them back come August...mmm...August:

The plum trees. Our utility company came and chopped them last year as they were in the way of our power lines. That reminds me, they mentioned something about how our lines are so sensitive to things touching them and that they were extremely "live" or something. Thankfully I can't remember so I can't obsess about it.
Anyway, hoping the chopping of the trees doesn't ruin the plums:

Poopoo.

I'm just seeing if you are paying attention. And since a large part of our trips around the yard involve pointing out Poopoo! Laddie Poopoo! you wouldn't want to be denied the experience. Oh, you would? Tough:

And because you were such good sports about the poop and all, enjoy this next Sadie in the yard video:

How to Make Mozzarella Cheese...

With a toddler.
First, you'll need rennet, milk, citric acid, a thermometer and a big ol' stainless steel pot.
Oh, and a toddler. Preferably one this cute:

Dissolve the rennet in water. We use vegetable rennet over here. See the whole milk? You can make it with lowfat milk, but why bother?

It's not going to be delicious.

C'mon, you might as well just save yourself the effort and eat rubber or chew on a tire or something. And those two things have no calories so they are definitely diet-friendly.

Anyway, dissolve the rennet:

Mix 2 tsp citric acid with 1 cup water:
Look down at kitchen floor and see crazy child hopping around. Behold the mess she has made so far. Realize that you are only a few minutes into what is at least a 1/2 hour process. Wonder what else will happen:
Pour citric acid into milk in pot. Turn up heat and wait for the milk to hit 90 degrees:

Toddler finds spare pot. Knows how cute she is:

90 degrees! Add rennet, stir for 30-60 seconds, turn heat off and let sit for 5 minutes. Hear ominous noises from down the hall. Hey, where the heck did Sadie just go? Oh yeah, down the hall. :
Better check that out. Oh, hey Sadie. Why are you hissing at me?:

Milk is not in thick curds the way it should be. Let it sit a bit longer:

The curds are still too small so I whipped out the cheesecloth to strain it and hoped that it would catch all the curd:

It seemed to work, but then I was confronted with the dilemma of how the heck one cleans cheesecloth. I'll tell you a secret- I threw it out, I am going to just buy a new one..shhhh. Don't hate me- Our washing machine broke yesterday and we are currently without a way to clean clothes, and that puppy was not washing off in the sink by hand. Yes! I tried, what do you think I am, a monster???

Toddler can no longer take you ignoring her. PAY ATTENTION TO ME!!!!!!
Take out curds, heat up in pot or microwave and squeeze and knead:
While you are kneading and it is impossible to touch anything, toddler decides to visit one of her favorite haunts, the garbage. What does she find? The eggshells (raw egg) from the earlier baking of cookies, of course:
Suddenly you are bombarded with images of your child stricken with Salmonella, lying in a hospital bed. The doctors are shaking their heads, wondering what kind of mother you are, Letting a child, a child! play in the garbage with raw eggs!

So you say "GET away from the garbage, Sadie!" forcefully. Hoping that for once she'll actually listen when you say no. Well, it works. Maybe a little too well:

OK, a few snuggles later, everyone's OK. You heat and knead the curds again. The cheese gets shiny and mozzarella-y looking:

You cool it down and oh my goodness. You made cheese. I made cheese!

Yum!

And for being such a good sport during my neglectful cheese experiment we went outside and played with bubbles until we were a soapy mess:

Three Sadies

I am becoming addicted to Photoshop. I love messing with the pictures, even though I have NO idea what I'm doing. Just wait until I actually read a book about it!
Here are three pictures of Sadie. The first is the original, the next two are what I messed with. I like the last. Subtle changes, but I think better.

Aherm...still waiting on that camera. Aaahheeerrrmmm....

Portland Park

As you know we went up to Portland the other day. While Baxter was chewing up everything in our yard we were hanging out with our friend Rachel and her fella and playing at the park. Here are a couple of pictures I took and a video for your viewing pleasure.

Oh, and Sadie is putting 2 words together. The first two 2 word phrases were "Laddie poopoo" and "Poopoo yucky." Are you noticing a theme here?
What does this say about us as parents?

The (Occasional) Bane of My Existence

Baxter.


The dog next door. Laddie loves him, he loves Laddie. His dad brings him over to play.
He is 8 months old and already bigger than Laddie.
He has no concept of how big he is.
He's not neutered.
He is out of his mind.
He jumps all over us and I can't be out in the yard with Sadie when he's there because he's so big and oaf-like.
BUT, we feel bad because Laddie never goes for walks because I can't walk him and the baby at the same time. When Baxter comes over it's like Laddie's at his own private dog park that I don't have to drive him to in the car while he slobbers all over the baby in the back seat and muddies it all up and is impossible to even walk to the dog park from the car without being yanked and holding Sadie.

But besides being big and a bit out of control, Baxter likes to eat things. If there's a shoe out he grabs it and runs as fast as he can. He'll lick anything, bite anything, jump on anything. Here's what he did to Sadie's beach ball the other day:

We went to Portland yesterday and our neighbor was nice enough to bring Baxter over and let Laddie out so he wasn't locked up for 12 hours. So he left Baxter and Laddie to play. When we got home the yard was strewn with chewed up items.

These items included:

1. A bucket
2. Our hose at the front of the house!!! He. chewed. through. the. hose.
3. Sadie's favorite ball
4. Water bowl
5. A roll of twine
6. Sadie's toy broom
7. The kid's tent that we bought the last time we were at Ikea for Sadie to play in. The tent that had something wrong with one of the poles. The tent that was waiting for the tent pole that I went and got a replacement for that very day while we were in Portland. The tent that I saw in a mangled, torn mess when we got home and I excitedly went to put it in so Sadie could finally use the tent. Yep, that tent.

And that's all I can think of right now. This is AFTER we thought we Baxter-proofed, he managed to break onto the deck.

That dog makes me crazy. Oh, and he pees on my plants.

And since I know you want to see some Sadie, here are a few pics from the car ride up to PDX (Portland):

It kills me every time...

When my BFF Shelby (Schleck) came out in February we had such a good time. We yapped and laughed and yapped and laughed. We sat and yapped about absolutely nothing and everything and bored Will to tears.

We also went to visit a winery and had a tour and a lovely lunch and some sips of delicious wine. Then we decided to go outside and hang out on the front veranda and take some pictures. I really wanted some nice shots of Sadie and Schleck because it's pretty beautiful up there.

However, when we got outside Sadie made a beeline for the stairs and we spent the next 10 minutes going up and down them. Now, Sadie was only 14 months at this point so she needed help doing this. So we went up, we went down, we went up, we went...you get the picture.
Also, the stairs ended in the driveway so we had to be extra diligent in keeping her in our grasp just in case a car went past.

So, after many trips up and down the steps we took her over to the other end of the veranda (porch?) and were trying to entertain her and take some pictures. All she did was buck and carry on, so we went and indulged her stair fetish a bit longer and then took her back to the picture spot.
Again, she went running towards the stairs.

So we tried to distract her and get some pictures of Aunt Bee and Sadie. The progression of shots I got never fails to make me laugh until tears roll down my cheeks. I don't know if anyone but me will find this amusing but I asked "Bee" if I could post them for her to see too. She said yes, I hope she still agrees after she sees them.

Enjoy, and I'm narrating as we go.

Sadie runs towards steps again and Schleck walks with her:


Schleck picks up Sadie to bring her to our (non-death trap) spot to play and take pics. Notice Sadie's face at being denied more stair time:

I try to get Schleck to smile for the shot. She obliges, even though Sadie is bucking and carrying on:

We both laugh at something. Sadie is still thinking about the stairs even though we are trying to amuse her and talk to her:

Gosh, isn't Schleck a good sport? Look at this kid! I'm surprised she hasn't demanded I put down the damn camera and keep my own kid out of the street myself. Why am I making her the bad guy?


OK, the bucking has gotten to be too much. That kid can buck! She can also cry REALLY loud. Aunt Bee's arms need a break. This kid is nuts! But she continues to hold on and keep the little such and such from running to her precious stairs and getting run over. Where is this child's mother????:


Ahhh, defeated. If you have kids, heck, if you've ever been alone with a toddler for over 15 minutes you have had this look on your face at some point. It says, I can't take anymore of this bucking child! Do you want to get run over by a car? I will think only pleasant thoughts. I am not here, I am in my happy place:

And this is one second later. After we realized the look was on her face. We laughed and laughed:

And Sadie got down, and guess where she ran? Yeah, you know where.

Oh, and Aunt Bee is the BEST with Sadie. Seriously, she is like the baby/toddler queen. Sadie even said Shelbee that week. That's how much she rocks, happy-place-face notwithstanding. Like I said, if you don't have that face at least once around a crazy, bucking toddler than you're not human or you're on some awesome drugs.

I am plotting my plan and laying the groundwork for luring her to live near me. You hear that, A.B.?